HOW DO WE COMMUNICATE?

Most people think about speech when they think about communication but there are many other ways we can also use to communicate with each other.

• Facial expressions
• Gestures
• Pointing / Using hands
• Writing
• Drawing
• Using equipment e.g. Text message or computer
• Touch
• Eye contact

For communication to be effective we also have to be able to understand what others are trying to communicate to us.

• Understanding language
• Hearing
• Ability to see
• Reading skills
• Ability to recognise and use information
• Memory to recall and understand information

BASIS FOR COMPARISON

VERBAL COMMUNICATION
Meaning : The communication in which the sender uses words to transmit the message to the receiver is known as verbal communication.
Types : Formal and Informal
Time Consuming : No
Chances of transmission of wrong message : Rarely happens.
Documentary Evidence : Yes, in case of written communication.
Advantage : The Message can be clearly understood and immediate feedback is possible.
Presence : The message can be transmitted through letters, phone calls, etc. so the personal presence of the parties, doesn't make any change.

NON-VERBAL COMMUNICATION
Meaning : The communication that takes place between sender and receiver with the use of signs is known as non-verbal communication.
Types : Chronemics, Vocalics, Haptics, Kinesics, Proxemics, Artifacts.
Time Consuming  : Yes
Chances of transmission of wrong message  : Happens most of the time.
Documentary Evidence : No
Advantage : Helpful in understanding emotions, status, lifestyle and feelings of the sender.
Presence : The personal presence of both the parties to communication is a must.

Different people have different ways of communicating that work best for them. Some of the different types of communication are:

Verbal  communication - Differences in how you speak, including the tone, pitch, speed and volume of your voice could change how your messages are taken in. Try to avoid using jargon or abbreviations and complicated words and terminology. Make sure you always speak in a respectful way, adjusting your speech to suit the individual.

Sign language - This is a recognised language throughout the world. British Sign Language (BSL) is used by individuals in this country and there are variations of sign language in different regions.

Makaton - This is a form of language that uses a large collection of signs and symbols. It is often used with those who have learning and physical disabilities, or hearing impairment.

Braille - Is a code of raised dots that are ‘read’ using touch. For people who are visually impaired or who are blind, the system supports reading and writing.

Body language – This is a type of nonverbal communication. There are many different aspects of body language, including gestures, facial expressions, eye contact, body positioning and body movements. Each of these will communicate information about an individual or a worker often without them realising it.

Gestures – These are hand or arm movements that emphasise what is being said or used as an alternative to speaking.

Facial expressions – These support what is being said by showing reactions or feelings. They can give you valuable clues that you can use to check out a  person’s feelings.

Eye contact - Maintaining good eye contact is an important way for a worker to show that they are engaged and listening.

Position - The way that we stand, sit or hold our arms when we are talking will provide others with clues about our feelings, attitude and emotions.

Written communication - This method is used to send messages, keep records, or provide avidence

source : http://keydifferences.com/difference-between-verbal-and-non-verbal-communication.html#ixzz4VdcHL7s0

source : http://www.skillsforcare.org.uk/Documents/Learning-and-development/Care-Certificate/Standard-6.pdf

WHEN AND WHY YOU NEED TO NEGOTIATE?

Accommodating
Individuals who enjoy solving the other party's problems and preserving personal relationships. Accommodators are sensitive to the emotional states, body language, and verbal signals of the other parties. They can, however, feel taken advantage of in situations when the other party places little emphasis on the relationship.

Accommodation is a passive but prosocial approach to conflict. People solve both large and small conflicts by giving in to the demands of others. Sometimes, they yield because they realize that their position is in error, so they agree with the viewpoint adopted by others. In other cases, however, they may withdraw their demands without really being convinced that the other side is correct, but for the sake of group unity or in the interest of time--they withdraw all complaints. Thus, yielding can reflect either genuine conversion or superficial compliance.

Avoiding
Individuals who do not like to negotiate and don't do it unless warranted. When negotiating, avoiders tend to defer and dodge the confrontational aspects of negotiating; however, they may be perceived as tactful and diplomatic. Inaction is a passive means of dealing with disputes. Those who avoid conflicts adopt a "wait and see" attitude, hoping that problems will solve themselves. Avoiders often tolerate conflicts, allowing them to simmer without doing anything to minimize them. Rather than openly discussing disagreements, people who rely on avoidance change the subject, skip meetings, or even leave the group altogether (Bayazit & Mannix, 2003). Sometimes they simply agree to disagree (a modus vivendi).

Collaborating
Individuals who enjoy negotiations that involve solving tough problems in creative ways. Collaborators are good at using negotiations to understand the concerns and interests of the other parties. Collaborating is an active, pro-social, and pro-self approach to conflict resolution.

Collaborating people identify the issues underlying the dispute and then work together to identify a solution that is satisfying to both sides. This orientation, which is also described as collaboration, problem solving, or a win-win orientation, entreats both sides in the dispute to consider their opponent's outcomes as well as their own,

Competing
Individuals who enjoy negotiations because they present an opportunity to win something. Competitive negotiators have strong instincts for all aspects of negotiating and are often strategic. Because their style can dominate the bargaining process, competitive negotiators often neglect the importance of relationships. Competing is an active, pro-self means of dealing with conflict that involves forcing others to accept one's view.

Those who use this strategy tend to see conflict as a win-lose situation and so use competitive, powerful tactics to intimidate others. Fighting (forcing, dominating, or contending) can take many forms, including authoritative mandate, challenges, arguing, insults, accusations, complaining, vengeance, and even physical violence (Morrill, 1995). These conflict resolution methods are all contentious ones because they involve imposing one's solution on the other party.

Compromising
Individuals who are eager to close the deal by doing what is fair and equal for all parties involved in the negotiation. Compromisers can be useful when there is limited time to complete the deal; however, compromisers often unnecessarily rush the negotiation process and make concessions too quickly.

A job interview: “What are you offering, and what can you expect to get in return? Ask them some questions about their attitude to rewarding success and commitment. What is their long-term vision for the organisation and the people in it? Such questions help you look strong and interested on a deeper level than usual,” says Charles.

Your salary: “You are in an objectively weak position. You have huge Needs, but an employer has a huge choice of candidates! The key thing is to project competence and confidence: you want the employer to believe that she/he will be better off by employing you and not the other candidates.

“What if I do really well in my first six months? Might you see your way to stepping up the salary a notch?” Ask directly if there is any flexibility on the salary or working methods, but in doing so show that you see the employer’s point of view:“To be quite honest, on this salary I’ll struggle to afford the rent and the commute!”

Suzie Cuddy is the UK Resourcing Advisor at O2′s Telefonica, so we asked her advice on how she suggests we negotiate salary, especially if you’re offered a salary that will barely cover your outgoings. “Never take a job that would cover your means. Not only will this lead to obvious financial strains like serious issues of not being able to pay rent or bills etc, but it could also lead to serious stress. Stress is never what you want out of a job and being in a job that means you cannot support yourself will only cause unnecessary stress.”

“Talk to the company and explain to them your situation and how much you would love to work for them but it just would not be financially viable for you. If they really want you and are really interested they will do something to get you on-board.”

Working flexibly: “It does no harm to attempt a negotiation of sorts in a job interview as long as it is done in a sensible, constructive way. That in itself projects adult confidence. ‘What if you look at allowing me to work from home three days a fortnight after I have proved myself for a couple of months?’

“Note that in both these cases you are trading Resources/Control around the idea of Time,” says Charles.

WHY SHOULD WOMEN NEGOTIATE?
Linda Babcock did a study for her book Women Don’t Ask where she found that there was a 7.6% difference between the salaries that women MBAs were getting and those that men were getting. A lot had been written on the comparable work issue already and much of the blame for the difference had been placed on organizations - basically institutional sexism.

Linda doesn’t say that doesn’t happen, but she does ask if there is something more. One of the questions she asked people is, “When you got your offer, did you attempt to negotiate?” She found that about 7% of women attempted to negotiate, while 57% of men did. Of those people who negotiated, they were able to increase their salary by over 7%. So, you can see that if women and men negotiated in similar proportions, that 7.6% difference would be cut dramatically.

One of the things I ask my students is: If you think of a $100,000 salary, and one person negotiates and gets $107,000, and the other doesn’t—what’s the cost of that? In a simple-minded way, some people say, "Is $7,000 really worth risking my reputation over?” And I agree, $7,000 may not be worth your reputation.

But that’s not the correct analysis, because that $7,000 is compounded. If you and your counterpart who negotiated are treated identically by the company—you are given the same raises and promotions—35 years later, you will have to work eight more years to be as wealthy as your counterpart at retirement. Now, the question is: $7,000 may not be worth the risk, but how about eight years of your life?

source : https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Negotiation
source : https://gothinkbig.co.uk/features/why-negotiating-is-a-skill-you-should-learn
source : https://www.themuse.com/advice/why-women-must-ask-the-right-way-negotiation-advice-from-stanfords-margaret-a-neale

WHAT IS NEGOTIATION AND PERSUASION?

NEGOTIATION
Negotiation is a method by which people settle differences. It is a process by which compromise or agreement is reached while avoiding argument and dispute.

In any disagreement, individuals understandably aim to achieve the best possible outcome for their position (or perhaps an organisation they represent). However, the principles of fairness, seeking mutual benefit and maintaining a relationship are the keys to a successful outcome.

Specific forms of negotiation are used in many situations: international affairs, the legal system, government, industrial disputes or domestic relationships as examples. However, general negotiation skills can be learned and applied in a wide range of activities.  Negotiation skills can be of great benefit in resolving any differences that arise between you and others.

PERSUASION
Persuasion is a process aimed at changing a person's (or a group's) attitude or behavior toward some event, idea, object, or other person(s), by using written or spoken words to convey information, feelings, or reasoning, or a combination of them.

source : https://www.skillsyouneed.com/ips/negotiation.html#ixzz4X8pKlmXZ
source : http://www.businessdictionary.com/definition/persuasion.

kita biasa nampak (Malaysian obviously) perkataan 'nego' di media sosial terutamanya wechat (as what I see) bila ada orang nak jual barang dan dia akan kata harga boleh 'nego'. actually 'nego' ni datangnya dari 'Negotiation' yang bermaksud rundingan.

'Persuasion' pula dalam Bahasa Melayunya ialah 'pujukan'

DIFFERENCE AND SIMILARITIES : MEN AND WOMEN IN A WORKPLACE

What are the differences and similarities on a workplace environment for a women and for a men? Is it still the men dominating the work market? Who takes more responsibility for child care? What factors predict work-life conflict among fathers and mothers?

The difference and similarities between men and women has been always a great topic to discuss. For so many years the men has been dominating the work market and the women was always bellow the man when it comes to work subject. The women was always given the “stay home” or “homemaker” tag. But today this scenario is changing dramatically.

Women are more than ever interested on jobs that before only men could dream of having.
On the same way the scenario for the men has been changing greatly.

The number of staying home dad’s has increased these last 10 years, according to the NCSW 2008 (National study of the changing workforce).

Because of the changes on the workplace environment, the women today is fighting for her rights and getting into places never dreamed of.

When it comes to workplace subject, there are many similarities and many differences between men and women.

Based on the NCSW 2008, men and women are similar in their desire for workplace flexibility, demonstrating that balancing work and personal responsibilities is not simply a women’s issue.
Although women face more challenges in achieving work/life balance, women and men equally desire a variety of informal and formal flexible work arrangements.

Clearly, workplace flexibility is no longer just about women and child care, but is more likely a quality of life issue for all employees.

Despite similar ambitions, the number of women at the top remains low compared to the number of men.

NSCW latest censuses show that although women make up 50.5 percent of the U.S. workforce, they hold only 15.7 percent of corporate officer positions in the Fortune 500 and 13.6 percent of board director seats. They hold only 7.9 percent of Fortune 500 highest titles, and represent only 5.2 percent of top earners.

Furthermore, the majority of women corporate officers are in staff positions rather than line positions, which have profit-and-loss responsibility and more often lead to the top. Only 9.9 percent of line corporate officer jobs are held by women.

Although women and men experience many of the same barriers to success, women face a host of stereotypes and environmental challenges that their male colleagues do not, including exclusion from informal networks, gender-based stereotypes, lack of role models, and they also have to deal with sexual harassment.

The sexual harassment topic is something that many times women have to deal, versus the men that is usually the one trying to get advantage of the female employee.

In addition, women are significantly more likely than men to face challenges balancing their work and personal lives. They have also made more choices and trade-offs between their work and personal lives.

According to the NCSW 2008 there are more father’s at home taking care of the children than ten years ago.

The number of staying home mom decreased and the number of staying home dad increased.
This is all a reflection of this new rule of workplace today. The fact that a women has children does not make her to stop her plans for a better carrier.

The women today has a new spirit of entrepreneurship that was not seen so often before. The women today are opening business and going back to college. The women today is taking her professional life to a whole another level and proofing that they can achieve their dreams and they can make it happen, just like the men can.

The workplace has changed in the past ten years and will keep changing for a long time.

The men and the women are adapting to all these economical problems that the world is confronting and that is one of the reasons that we see more women working today then ten years ago.

The women knows that they need to work to help pay the bills and also for her self esteem.

I believe that the women that works have a much better self esteem then the women that stay home with the children.

I’m very proud to be a women and to participate on the workplace environment. I can learn a lot from all the new contacts with people and with all the obstacle that I confront at work.

The women today deserves all the recognitions from our society. Our women today not only takes care of the children, but they also go to school and they run businesses.

Here are some general variations in the way men and women communicate.

• Women and men are now days both concern on a great carrier.
• Women concerns more about taking care of the kids than the men.
• Women are still making less money than the men holding the same job.
• There is much more women that works from home, then men.
• Women deals much more with Sexual Harassment then the men.
• Women have to deal with maternity leave and the men don’t
• Both styles of communication are equally valid. 

Men and women communicating in the work  place.

DIFFERENCE

1. Men focus on power / rank / status. Women focus on relationships.
2. Men talk to give information or report. Women talk to collect information or gain rapport.
3. Men talk about things (business, sports, food). Women talk about people / relationships.
4. Men focus on facts, reason and logic. Women focus on feelings, senses and meaning.
5. Men thrive on competing and achieving. Women thrive on harmony and relating.
6. Men "know" by analyzing and figuring out. Women "know" by intuiting.
7. Men are more assertive. Women are more cooperative.
8. Men tend to be focused, specific, logical. Women are holistic and organic.
9. Men are at ease with order, rules and structure. Women with fluidity.
10. Men immediately want to get working on a project. Women tend to ask lots of questions before beginning a project.
11. Men want to think. Women want to feel.

SIMILARITIES

1. Men and women both still use written communication via e-mail or SMS to communicate each other.
2. Men and women both show gestures when speaking as an example of hand and arm movement.
3. Men and women both make eye contact when talking or communicate with each other.
4. Men and women both show the body language so the others can easily understand what they are saying.
5. Men and women both are still associating emotions in communication with each other.

Giving Orders
Several well-respected studies have shown women tend to soften their demands and statements, whereas men tend to be more direct. Women, for example, use tag lines, phrases like, "don't you think" following the presentation of an idea, "if you don't mind" following a demand or "this may be a crazy idea, but" preceding a suggestion.

Many women are conditioned by culture to maintain harmony in relationships. That conditioning is manifested in softened demands, hedged statements and a generally more tentative communication style.

The important thing to remember is that tentative communication does not mean the speaker actually feels tentative or is lacking in confidence. Similarly, more direct communication -- as seen with some men and, because we can't generalize, some women, too -- does not mean the person is arrogant, bossy or feels superior. These are nothing more than learned ways of communicating.

Asking Questions
women generally ask more questions than men. We have all heard or experienced the anecdote about the man who refuses to stop to ask directions when lost. We get a good chuckle out of this story, but differences in how and when questions are asked can create real confusion in the workplace.
Asking questions means different things to men and women. Men ask questions for one purpose only: to gather information. For women, asking questions serves two purposes: One is to gather information but, as you've probably noticed, women will also ask questions when they already know the answers. Why? They want to show interest in what the other person has said to cultivate the relationship.

Overcoming Misunderstandings and Misinterpretations
Men are perfectly right to be more direct and ask fewer questions, while women and some men are simply more comfortable with a softer style of communicating. The problem arises when these differences lead to misunderstandings and misinterpretations, which can ultimately disrupt teamwork and even derail someone's chances for upward mobility.

source : https://alinelowry.wordpress.com/2009/04/07/the-difference-and-similarities-between-men-and-women-in-a-workplace/